We Learned How to Handle Stares…

At some point or another we’ve all stared at something.  We stare mostly at things that are different, whether it is something we think is creative, beautiful, confusing, suspenseful, unique, funny, dangerous or even disgusting.  Some of us might even have the guts to approach whatever we are staring at so we can get more information.  Sounds innocent enough, right?  Well, it might be... until you are the one being stared at.


During the Phoenix UBelong program, we learned how to use tools like STEPS to help us feel more comfortable during these moments, starting with building our confidence with a little positive self-talk.  From there we start thinking about everything our body language communicates to others, like our tone of voice, eye contact, and posture, then we finish it off with a smile!  Body language is often the first impression we make on others, and STEPS give us that nudge when we’re not feeling confident, but we want to look confident!

We also learned that it can be helpful to have a standard couple of lines ready to say if someone does ask us a question, especially if we’re not comfortable talking about it yet.  Rehearse Your Response helps us do just that, by breaking our answer down into three short sentences –

  1. How/when you or your family member was injured
  2. How you are doing now, and
  3. Politely ending the conversation.

We really like this tool because it settles the other person’s curiosity but still let us keep what we want private. 

If you want to learn more about these tools and how to use them, you can check out Phoenix Society’s Beyond Surviving, Tools for Thriving program here: https://www.phoenix-society.org/resources/entry/beyond-surviving-tools-for-thriving .

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Recent Comments

Mohammed    Moderate:
11:56pm - Jun 5, 2017

My problem is children’s questions about my skin and how it happened but older people they are mature